INJURED MANNING BEGS TO BE EXCLUDED FROM WATCHING ANYMORE COLTS GAMES



Peyton Manning can hardly stand the
taste of Gatorade while sidelined, but
understands his endorsement obligations.



It comes as no surprise to anyone, but without Peyton Manning this year, the Indianapolis Colts are borderline unwatchable.  What may come as a surprise, is that Peyton himself doesn't even think its borderline.

"Nerve damage is one thing, but I may need Lasik [surgery] after havin' watched some of this shit!"  Manning's stern position toward this situation couldn't go unnoticed while at the team's practice facility.  Which is why some closest to this matter feel management will conjure up some "personal affairs" excuse that the franchise quarterback will undoubtedly have to attend to. 

According to sources, Peyton Manning had first requested that the organization get NFL Sunday Ticket in the owner's box, as a resolution to the All-Pro's viewing dilemma.  But with attendance down due to abysmal back-up quarterback play and a defensive line that couldn't stop shoplifting, the Colt's front office felt it best to just excuse Peyton rather than spend money on the somewhat expensive Directv package.

In an unrelated story, Peyton Manning will become the first inactive player to receive a substantial amount of MVP votes.